Sunday, July 15, 2012

Resting State

As a result of what is known as "round ligament" pain, I am resting today. I was never taught this skill, and therefore am not very good at it. I look around and see a million different things I could be doing (windows, floors, lining dresser drawers, cleaning out cabinets, re-painting the coffee table) and can't.

So, I shop. Online. Which is incredibly dangerous because it's so damn easy.

We decided to re-do our living room. Our couch is 10+ years old and while it still looks awesome, I'm certain it's destroying our backs. Seeing as we plan (will be forced) to spend a lot of time at home after December, we decided it was worth the investment to upgrade our furniture.

I hate spending money. Especially on large purchases. I agonized for weeks over the couch. It's ridiculous, until you realize that I am still under the impression that my financial situation is the same as 21-year old Courtney who bounced checks to get cash and strategically planned which bills could be skipped each month. I am so terrified of ever being in that position again that spending money paralyzes me with fear.

I hope I can stop resting soon. It gives me anxiety.

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